Status update 2014

–Bob Fleming, The Fast Show

beavbuttsickYes, folks, I haven’t posted much so far in 2014, but unfortunately I’ve been battling a nasty lingering cough, either the same one I’ve had since Christmas, or a close relative that’s taken over from the original.  So much for being healthier and getting sick less often!  Mind you, there’s a lot of it about — especially in my office, where even the indefatigable Aussie woman (my de facto boss on laptop matters) spends all day coughing as badly as me.  The worst part is, I’ve been taking antibiotics since Wednesday, and although it was better on Thursday, it got worse again on Friday — so is my quack trying to ruin my life?

Naturally I have a date on Sunday evening, though this time I might be wise and postpone it rather than hope Lemsip Max Strength etc. can hold back the symptoms… and that brings me onto the main thrust of this entry (ooh, Matron!) — how I’m getting on with my list of quasi-resolutions for the New Year: (excuse me while I copy and paste from the original post…)

  1. Get laid: obviously incomplete as yet, due to my cold-related misery, though I am at least meeting and talking to young women, and hope to have formed closer ties (i.e. second base) before too long.  The girl I’m seeing on Sunday is one I managed to chat up at a meetup event, and I’m hoping she hasn’t friend-zoned me already and actually wants our meeting to be a date.  There’s also a Japanese woman raised in America (ah, that sounds like a nice combination!) who has gotten in touch with me via after I met her friend in, er, June, so maybe I’ll get to meet her as well. However, it’ll probably be February at the earliest that I can see anyone, unless Beechams have found a cure by Sunday evening!
  2. Get a new job: since I hope to wait at my current workplace until I can be made redundant, this one’s also on hold — but rest assured I’m studying for my Windows 7 exam, which is a necessary stepping stone.  I’m even managing to do well at the mock exams, as instead of bitching about it, I’m researching the stuff in questions that isn’t in the study material (e.g. the Scanstate switch /efs:copyraw)!
  3. Get rid of my books: haven’t made any progress on this per se (got no reply from Friern Barnet People’s Library when I asked if I could donate), but have started getting Kindle e-books to read on my gigantic smartphone, and may put the credit I got for my old phone towards a proper Kindle.  Pratchett’s on Kindle, and so are some free out-of-copyright books (such as my favourite novel of all time, The War of the Worlds — no, it doesn’t have Tom Cruise on the cover!), so it’s the right time to switch.
  4. Get buff: although the mucus in my lungs is restricting my breath, I have at least continued seeing my personal torturer regularly, who reckons I’m still doing well, and that I most certainly have my strongman great-grandfather’s genes!  A pity my weight continues to hover around 13st. (that’s about 180lb. for our American readers, and some number of kilograms for everyone else), but perhaps it’s muscle.
  5. Get better at climbing: again, due to my illness, I’ve only been climbing a couple of times — but I’m definitely making progress towards doing 6a routes, thanks to the Session instructors at the Castle.  And now that “best mate” lives in Manor House, I hope to be able to climb with him a lot more often, as he at least won’t have to worry about getting home afterwards!
  6. Get more Gwar: sorry, Oderus, I haven’t even ordered War Party yet — but don’t cleave me in twain with Unt Lick, for I still go “yyyes!” whenever your mighty group of alien barbarian demigods come on in my musical rotation.  I’ll order it once this damn cold’s gone, how about that?  Release the cure to the vile disease you created, and I’ll pay you money so Sleazy can buy you some crack!
  7. Get a guitar: no, not catarrh, I’ve got enough of that already!  I bought a cheap guitar from Cash Converters (decent enough to practice on), and have learned to tune it thanks to an app; I’ve been strumming with middling success, and am learning to switch between A- and D-chords, thanks to a “learn the guitar” book that the previous owner had left in the bag.  However, I don’t have much time to practice at the moment, what with everything else that’s going on — and I found out I can’t approximate the opening to “New York Mining Disaster 1941”, because even though I know how to play an A-chord, Barry Gibb tunes his guitar Hawaiian-style, rather than “normal” fashion!
  8. Get a driving licence: not begun, as I want to get my new job in the bag first.
  9. Get in touch with my father: I’ve got too much else going on to even begin this one!
  10. Get the hell out of here: another one I won’t begin until earlier ones are done (at least getting rid of excess books so I have less to transport, and finding a new job so I know where I should live).

Now, while you may find this list disappointing, remember it is only January, and I’m feeling generally lousy — and going out frequently doesn’t help.  Why, on Monday evening I’ve got to go to a singles yoga event, because the yoga guy is playing host to my dating coach — so that’s two of the people who have helped me in one place (my personal torturer won’t be there too, he’s already married!).  I’ve also got personal training on Friday, but I hope to leave the rest of the week free to recuperate, or at least ride out the worst of it… and, of course, to study.

And despite my miserable condition, I’m still doing amazing things: er, like replacing the hard drive in my mother’s computer (the miniature one I got her for Christmas in 2012), which had begun clicking loudly, even though it would work perfectly after being turned off and on again (an increasing number of times), and not even give any S.M.A.R.T. status errors.  Because the new one is a Western Digital, I was able to use their free version of Acronis to clone her hard drive across (as I did with my own when I got the SSD — even though my WD drive isn’t the system drive!), and thus obviated having to reinstall Windows 7 from scratch, and download her personal files from Dropbox.

(This will mark the third time I’ve had to return a hard drive to Seagate under warranty… and, I think, the second time it’s not a Seagate drive I’m returning, but one from a different company that they bought out and then somehow caused to fail through telekinesis!)

And that’s all from me tonight — I should to try to sleep now, but I’d still have to get up at midnight for my antibiotic, and probably a cold remedy as well.  And I can’t drink alcohol… Oh Dear, How Sad, Never Mind!

And if no.1 on my list is crossed out by Monday, I’m lying, okay?  (Unless this girl has a catarrh fetish!)


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