Oh, what fresh hell is this?

“…approximately 20 pounds of an impacted clay-like substance…” –Autopsy report for a man believed to have been Elvis Presley (but actually a body double)

This isn’t good: I’m hoping it’s just a stomach bug, or a lack of fibre (I’d eat All-Bran if it didn’t taste so damned foul), but there’s also the possibility it’s a stomach ulcer — I’ll have to ask the doctor quack tomorrow.  All I know is, since the weekend I’ve felt like I’m carrying a housebrick in my intestines, which means I actually feel some discomfort at the moment when I sit down, and it’s been getting worse today, with the (ahem) usual means not relieving it at all.

An ulcer?  But I’m only (only?) 35 and seldom drink, and it’s not like I do anything important at work, so how could I possibly have an ulcer?  Well, I do let things get to me (like today when the button came off my trousers, not long after I’d received a rather annoyed e-mail from my supervisor telling me I’d behaved in a “totally unacceptable” manner when dealing with a social worker — by which I think she means I wasn’t enthusiastic enough?), as you may have noticed — posting “What Really Grinds My Gears” posts is a form of stress-relief, so tough, you’ll have to put up with them for a while yet.

It’s also worth noting that a friend of mine at university, who was doing not only Geology but Astrophysics (as an undergrad), and frequently had to go to lectures for one during the break between lectures for the other, had to go into hospital for a stomach ulcer at the end of our second year at RHUL, though admittedly he drank rather more than me (as do 99.999% of students).  Maybe it’s H. pylori and not stress (or spicy food) wot causes it, but we’ll see what the doc says tomorrow…

Oh, and the reason I’m writing something tonight is that my computer class was cancelled due to “unforeseen circumstances” (well, if the circumstances had been foreseen, they’d have given us more warning, right?), but at least I’m off to New Malden tomorrow to have dinner with a friend.  Good to get out of the Smoke once in a while, isn’t it?  Just hope I don’t feel a whole lot worse by then, as I’m sure my friend would be bitterly disappointed at being denied my radiant presence…

(And yes, of course it was a body double — Elvis works at my local Tesco, with Lord Lucan and Amelia Earhart!  But mum’s the word…)


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